Friday, July 26, 2013

What God Wants You to Know This Week

More Tweets of God:

I get too much credit for Friday and not enough for Saturday.

If women didn't want to be sexually harassed they shouldn't have been born with intelligence, self-respect and dignity.

My philosophy is always leave 'em wanting more.  Money, food, time on earth, whatever.

If you can make a difference in the life of one person, it should probably be you.

The circumstances under which you should send a photo of your penis to other people are as follows:  never.

The people who think the world will end all at once will be largely responsible for it ending gradually.

I had a #RoyalBaby once.  Much more low-key.  No reporters.  No hospital.  No sex.

Listening = hearing + giving a crap.

You can't believe everything you read.  But many people don't even read what they believe.

Comic-Con is the biggest assemblage of celibate, hero-worshipping sci-fi-lovers since the Last Supper.

Life is unfair, but that's a good thing.  If it were fair, things would go even worse for you.

2 comments:

  1. I don't do Twitter, but your coverage of God's tweets makes me consider signing up and becoming a follower of at least the the big Guy hisself. Thanx

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  2. Kootcoot, you can just google @TheTweetofGod and get His page without having to be on twitter. That's what I do. I have Him bookmarked on my phone and I read him out loud at coffee time at work to my bigoted co-worker. Poor bigoted co-worker is not social media savvy at all and can't tell whether I am mocking him or really following God.

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