Wednesday, June 27, 2018

That Sounds Like Pretty Good Advice.

It's not every day you come across an article that beings like this:
The world is full of assholes. Wherever you live, whatever you do, odds are you’re surrounded by assholes. The question is, what to do about it?
What to do? The first step is to find someone who has done some research into, well, the sphincters among us.
Robert Sutton, a psychology professor at Stanford University, has stepped up to answer this eternal question. He’s the author of a new book, The Asshole Survival Guide, which is basically what it sounds like: a guide for surviving the assholes in your life.

Asshole survival, Sutton says, is a craft, not a science, meaning one can be good or bad at it. His book is about getting better at it.
Can you really tell an asshole when you see one?
There are a lot of academic definitions, but here’s how I define it: An asshole is someone who leaves us feeling demeaned, de-energized, disrespected, and/or oppressed. In other words, someone who makes you feel like dirt.

I would make a distinction between temporary and certified assholes, because all of us under the wrong conditions can be temporary assholes. I'm talking about somebody who is consistently this way, who consistently treats other people this way. I think it’s more complicated than simply saying an asshole is someone who doesn’t care about other people. In fact, some of them really do care — they want to make you feel hurt and upset, they take pleasure in it. 
Sutton won't call Trump an asshole, not openly, but admits he checks off all the boxes. He offers various strategies for dealing with sphincters that can vary according to whether the offender is in a position of power, a boss, or just an associate or co-worker. If you're struggling with someone of that exaggerated anatomy, you might find this article worth a read.


Lorne said...

Another weapon in the assenal, er, I mean arsenal, Mound.

The Mound of Sound said...

Yes indeed, Lorne.

Danneau said...

A man returns to the US following an extended stay abroad, in the course of which he has lost his passport and other pertinent ID. The immigration official asks him to verify that he is a genuine US citizen. He drops his trousers and points to a George Washington tattoo on the left cheek of his posterior, to which immigration says that anyone could have that done, so said gentleman literally turns the other cheek to reveal a splendid ink of Abraham Lincoln. Same reaction from immigration who finally relents when the traveller points out the genuine repro of Richard Nixon in the middle.

Could certainly substitute DJT, at risk of a long stint as a guest in the nearest ICE facility, or Stephen Harper this side of the 49th, and I'm just betting that JT and Rich Coleman are being added to the samples book as I write this.