 |
| We Own This Guy, Folks. We Own Him. |
The Official Sponsor of the Republican Party, the National Rifle Association, has announced that there will be no new gun control laws in America. It was all just the confused ramblings of a tired old man.
NRA officials had a late night sit down with president Trump last evening and sorted the old bugger out.
Association president, Wayne La Pierre, told reporters. "There's no telling what happened when Trump met with Republican and Democratic lawmakers the other day. Maybe his blood sugar was low. It could have just been a 'senior's moment.' He did seem even more confused than normal, silly old fart."
La Pierre said they showed up for the meeting with a family-size bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken (with all the fixings) and an incredibly lifelike, full size, Hope Hicks "companion" doll for the commander in chief "as a token of the NRA's enduring support."
Also in attendance at the meeting was Guy Phesteringsore, president of the Armalite division of Colt Firearms, proud manufacturers of the insanely popular M-16, M-4 and AR-15 family of assault rifles. Mr. Phesteringsore later announced that Colt has negotiated a naming-rights deal for the White House for the balance of Mr.Trump's first term. Henceforth the American landmark will feature illuminated signage reading "Colt Freedom House." The NRA logo will also be prominently displayed atop an elegantly backlit plinth on the front lawn.
4 comments:
That was foreseeable.
Good satire. But the domination these people have over the Puyi President is the obvious absolute truth. Trump knows that he must completely abase himself towards the GOP, because otherwise they have enough rope to hang him.
I suppose that's accurate, CRF. If the congressional Republicans turn on Trump he becomes easy meat for impeachment. He must be feeling profoundly boxed in.
You forgot to mention the new line of gold-colour, Trump-branded AR-15s that Phesteringsore agreed to produce under a licensing deal with the Trump Org. The new rifles come with an autographed red MAGA cap and a certificate of sanity from Trump's personal physician in case the buyer needs it to complete the purchase.
Cap
Post a Comment